Unapologetically Being Yourself and Finding Your Way

Finding yourself is hard, especially when you have people whispering in your ear and telling you what THEY think you should be/and do. Packing my stuff and moving to a new city was the best thing I've ever done. I've never been happier and I've never felt closer to my dreams. Here's what I've encountered and what I learned.

1. DO WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPIEST: if you want to rush into school do it, or if you want to go out to a bar on a monday at 11pm, go for it. If you feel like eating ice cream and takeout everyday then hell yes embrace it. But don't listen to other people. Sometimes doing what makes you happy is a big decision or sometimes its a series of little decisions.

2. CUT OUT EVERYONE NEGATIVE IN YOUR LIFE: I'm going to be the first to say that in high school I was a huge downer and I'm not surprised that my friends and I went separate ways (sorry guys, if you're reading this thanks for a great 4 years sorry it all went wrong). Having someone constantly saying negative crap in your ears gets exhausting and that's not what anyone needs in this life - we/especially me need uplifting people and friends to support and guide us.

3. DON'T TAKE SHIT FROM DUMB BOYS (OR GIRLS): I for one didn't go to New York to find love, I went to find myself, and somehow I think that's all that matters. Of course if I meet someone and I feel something I would be stupid to ignore it but then again I would also be stupid to keep watering a dead flower and I think we all get my point. To make matters short a good friend said to me, "You stopped putting up with his shit because you learned to love yourself" and I just want to thank that person for helping me realize that it wasn't the be-all-end-all, it was a new start for me.

4. MAKE A FASHION STATEMENT: This isn't high school, in New York you can wear whatever you want. If you want to wear heels everyday, you can, or if you want to wear striped pants and a paisley top, well you also can! In the words of one of the greatest men who ever lived, Bill Cunningham - "The best fashion show has definitely been on the street. Always has been, always will be". And hey, ever if your not in New York, who says you can't make your own fashion statement? Wear whatever the hell make you happy - don't dress for anyone but your damn self.

5. NEVER APOLOGIZE FOR BEING YOU: Never apologize for saying a comment you find relevant or making a joke that no one found funny. Don't change yourself for anyone because the people who want you wouldn't want you to change - they would be happy with you the way you are. Be you and be true to yourself because in this world thats one of the only things we have - a genuine sense of self.

In this city, I've learned so many things and I've met so many people. I want to dedicate this to someone (who should know who he is). I want to say thank you for making me feel bad about myself at one point and for making me feel like I wasn't good enough because I will never again let someone make me feel inferior because in fact, "no one can make you feel inferior without your consent". Thank you for not believing in me and giving me the power to believe in myself.

Until next time!

Meeting New People and Making New Friends

"Between 18-22 you meet a lot of temporary people." I've never read a quote truer than this. In my hometown I was shy and quiet and stuck to talking to people I knew and felt comfortable with. Since living in New York, I've opened up a lot more and have been way more outgoing. I've met so many great people so far and here are a few things that have worked for me.

  1. NEVER BE AFRAID TO SAY HI - sometimes saying "hi" is all you need to do to start up a great friendship. Of course being in New York sometimes the wrong kind of people can approach you, usually strange men, but they're easy to shrug off. My favorite place to talk to people is of course bars and Even if you don't say hi, start with something simple, like a compliment. (hint: it works 8/10 times).

2. SAY YES TO RANDOM PLANS - living with a bunch of random roommates has had its share of awful and its share of great moments. I've met people who I would have never talked to before in my life if I had just saw them on the street. I've gone to a lot of great bars with these people and I've had a lot of great memories all because I decided to go out. You never know what you're gonna learn and what they are going to be able to show you.

 3. GO OUT ALONE - my favorite thing about New York is how it is 100% acceptable to go out alone. I like to go out with my friends but my favorite thing is going out alone because it allows me to meet new people without having to worry about the burden of a friend. I love that if I want to stay out all night I can or I can hang out with someone after without worrying my friend is down for that. My favorite place to go out alone is either parks or museums, I've met so many random and wonderful people who enjoy solitude in the same way I do, but also enjoy a great conversation with a random stranger.

4. SMILE - this sounds so cheesy, but you would not believe how many people have came up to me to compliment me on my smile or say something about it. Smiling shows your true beauty and shows that you are open to talking to people.

In New York, I've met so many great people, who I would hope knew who they are, and I am so grateful for the opportunity to have met them. They've all been wonderful to me and I truly am #blessed.